With in a week, the media reporting the death of Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain. I don’t know much of them, I’ve heard of Spade clothing lines, but I don’t own any of the item. I don’t know anything about Anthony Bourdain other than he was the chef who dine with Obama while he was in Vietnam. I read about them on yahoo, and then moved on. However, our friend, who’s been sick, battling with cancer, and the recent round of radiation. Left him with no T-hormone, no energy, and has become super depressed. Reading the news is like feeding to his mind that he’s suffered enough. Although, he doesn’t experience any physical pain, just generally tiredness. But that was enough to put the idea of killing himself in his head.
Dear, celebrities, please committing suicide. Dear media, please stop reporting them as some sort of glory and noble act. Because, what you do could take our love ones away.
The media would portrait it as these guys went out on TOP. Got everything they ever wanted. And that can also be detrimental to someone who also feeling that they don’t have any more up, only down from this point. What’s in the news can be lethal.
This weekend put a wake up call on our heads for sure.
Our friend is a super successful person. Hold MD, MBA, and multiple publications. He’s highly accomplished physically and mentally at things that he does. That has become his identity – work and sport.
I was depressed before, and I went back to my root, my faith, my religion. I thanked my parents for giving me the guidance, so when I was at my lowest, when I couldn’t talk to anyone, I still have my faith. My friend didn’t have that, I hope he could find peace at some point, and rebound from this.
He’s in his late 60s, early 70s, and still working, still defining his selfworth through work. When my husband and I were talking in the car on the way to see him, “his wife should also quit her job so they both can enjoy the last 10-30 years together.” That was exactly what Mr.W and I desire, perhaps it’s not what our friend wants and needs.
Our friend’s health deteriorated pretty quickly, that make me wonder:
“Is it really worth it continuing working?”
“Is it worth it continuing hustling?”
“What is it that I really want to do now when I’m still in great health?”
- It’s probably “okay” still that I’m still working as we have no baby yet. It’s relatively safe to be at work, as at least 10 hours during the days, we’d stay out of trouble LOL 🙂 less time to shop, buying stuff to load up the house.
- My health is great, staying home all day, I’d probably reading all day long, and 1-3 hours of biking or walking in the wood (there is a park 1/2 mile away). We can’t really go to a foreign country to live or to travel as Mr.W’s mom needs our help.
- I still don’t know yet what I want to do in retirement. I was hoping to have a baby, so Mr.W and I can have a common purpose … raising a family LOL 🙂 Really, there are a lot of stuff that parents with small children would do that we’re left out of, soccer practice, game practice, homework, field trips and such hhaa… It would be a hassle for family with both of the parents are working, but if both of us aren’t working, we could transfer the baby back and forth ahah… maybe it’d be alot more enjoyable?!! In the scenario that we don’t have any children, I guess, we’ll be completely free of any duties?? Hummm… the options are limitless on what we can do. LOL 🙂 I think my husband is secretively wishing for this option. He’d probably want my full attention.
- In the case of our friend, he and his wife are doctors. They have a doctor daughter. He kept saying that his wife and daughter will be fine without him. He didn’t want to be a burden. It’s sad that you’d take care of people all your life, he was celebrating 40 years post medical school. 40 years of endless days, nights, weekends, and holidays of taking care of other people. However, he couldn’t stand a few short months of vast health declining.
- This posts a very important way of life – growing old gracefully, easing yourself to retirement. I’ll have to figure out a way out of 50-60 hours work week. (well, some weeks are better for landlording, other week I’m more involve).
It can be sad growing old … well, older. Because your friends and families are dying. Comparing to being a kids, surrounding with “Hope” “future”, “fruitful” … the going to be vs “been there, done that” “I’m checking out” LOL 🙂 \
My fear of the full retirement is insurance. If we got really sick, and the law of “existing condition” isn’t protected, we’d be screwed financially big time. Until this fear is calm, I’ll probably hold on to a part time job with benefits.